Home Search Calendar Help Login Register
Did you miss your activation email?
Andy Murray vs Kevin Anderson, Friday, Time: 12 noon BST - Discuss the match
MurraysWorld Discussions  >  Murray Community  >  Entourage  >  Becker says Judy Murray must go 0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic. « previous next »
Pages: 1 [2] Go Down Reply
Author

Becker says Judy Murray must go

 (Read 3194 times)
Aileen
Murraymaniac
**********
Posts: 35,894

Gender: Female
Location: Edinburgh


Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #15 on: April 02, 2011, 03:09 AM »
Reply






Yup.  There's a fine line between caring and wanting the best for your kids, and interfering too much in their lives.  Children are on loan to you, then you have to let them go and do their own thing, as adults - and that includes making mistakes.  Who learns anything if they don't make mistakes?  Give them a long piece of string and they'll always come back to you for help and advice when they need it.  At least, this is what I think.
That sounds like a pretty good approach to me.  My mother tried to interfere a little too much when I was growing up and it did me no favours, but I know now that she did it with the best of intentions.  Unfortunately, to quote a saying, the road to hell can be paved with them.

is Judy his mother protecting him, or smothering him? we can all draw our own inferences from Beckers article, although we have to realise we will taint our ideas with how our own relationship with our mothers is constructed. Andy is still maturing in the sense that he is building his own independent life, allowing his mother to dip in and out of it as he feels fit. Ultimately its not about Andy cutting the apron strings, but perhaps about Judy letting go more.
Interesting point that.

Quote
When i look at her relationship with Jamie, i get the sense that Jamie is able to find a more balanced approach with his mother. This is the kind of construct that Andy needs to nurture with his mother (it also depends on Judy allowing this to happen). A new coach that Andy wants - perhaps going against his mothers own ideas - is something i believe will speed up this maturing process for Andy and could signal to Judy, that its time she stepped back from the front line so to speak if indeed she is on it.
Of course, without knowing the family personally, this could be wide of the mark, but, despite what it may seem, I've always got the impression that Jamie is her favourite.  If true, could she be over-compensating for this by devoting so much of her time to Andy now?
IP Logged
Caz
Murraymaniac
**********
Posts: 22,317


I'd like to be the good person my dog thinks I am!

Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #16 on: April 02, 2011, 07:25 AM »
Reply

Yup.  There's a fine line between caring and wanting the best for your kids, and interfering too much in their lives.  Children are on loan to you, then you have to let them go and do their own thing, as adults - and that includes making mistakes.  Who learns anything if they don't make mistakes?  Give them a long piece of string and they'll always come back to you for help and advice when they need it.  At least, this is what I think.
Yep! Spot on Elly!
IP Logged
gibtennis
Newbie
*
Posts: 2


Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #17 on: April 02, 2011, 07:52 AM »
Reply

I wonder what Federer, Nole, Hewitt, Raffa think abour becker´s comments confused after all, judy murray is the only mother that has played any part of Andy´s carreer, she was his first coach.
IP Logged
gibtennis
Newbie
*
Posts: 2


Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #18 on: April 02, 2011, 08:54 AM »
Reply

I disagree.  Judy Murray was his first coach and when Andy reached the age of 15 she said could do no more for his carreer and sent him off to Spain.  That took a lot of courage for her and Andy, the apron strings were cut then.  Having to leave home and move to a foreign country at such a young age should be prove enough of his determination to be the best that he can.  At present he has no coach and it is only fitting that his mother should step in to help him out, what sort of a mother would she be if she didn´t.  He´ll pick up his game but support would be nice  rather than critisism.
IP Logged
Ruthie
Veteran
******
Posts: 8,935

Gender: Female
Location: East Midlands


Touch the sky - and touch it he did.

Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #19 on: April 02, 2011, 01:40 PM »
Reply

I disagree.  Judy Murray was his first coach and when Andy reached the age of 15 she said could do no more for his carreer and sent him off to Spain.  That took a lot of courage for her and Andy, the apron strings were cut then.  Having to leave home and move to a foreign country at such a young age should be prove enough of his determination to be the best that he can.  At present he has no coach and it is only fitting that his mother should step in to help him out, what sort of a mother would she be if she didn´t.  He´ll pick up his game but support would be nice  rather than critisism.
Well said gibtennis.  I don't like all this analysing of Andy's relationship with his mother when none of us can know the truth of it from outside.
IP Logged
Caz
Murraymaniac
**********
Posts: 22,317


I'd like to be the good person my dog thinks I am!

Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #20 on: April 02, 2011, 02:02 PM »
Reply

That's the thing! We can really only guess about the relationship Andy has with his mother. Is she just giving support or is she exerting a lot of influence on him!
Here you go Ruthie!
IP Logged
Ruthie
Veteran
******
Posts: 8,935

Gender: Female
Location: East Midlands


Touch the sky - and touch it he did.

Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #21 on: April 02, 2011, 02:19 PM »
Reply

 Hi Caz.  Yes we should all stop trying to guess this one.
Greetings from a very dark Tokyo ie no neon lights as I look out from my hotel window.   Do wish Andy would put us all out of our misery with a firm decision and one which will propel him back to the tennis he is capable of playing.
IP Logged
janscribe
Veteran
******
Posts: 7,597

Gender: Female
Location: Devon


Let's Go!!!

Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #22 on: April 02, 2011, 03:09 PM »
Reply

Yup.  There's a fine line between caring and wanting the best for your kids, and interfering too much in their lives.  Children are on loan to you, then you have to let them go and do their own thing, as adults - and that includes making mistakes.  Who learns anything if they don't make mistakes?  Give them a long piece of string and they'll always come back to you for help and advice when they need it.  At least, this is what I think.
  Agreed absolutely, Elly!
IP Logged
janscribe
Veteran
******
Posts: 7,597

Gender: Female
Location: Devon


Let's Go!!!

Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #23 on: April 02, 2011, 03:12 PM »
Reply

Hi Caz.  Yes we should all stop trying to guess this one.
Greetings from a very dark Tokyo ie no neon lights as I look out from my hotel window.   Do wish Andy would put us all out of our misery with a firm decision and one which will propel him back to the tennis he is capable of playing.
Come home safe, Ruthie! What a pity you have to go to Japan at this time, such a beautiful country I believe, but I'm sure your expertise is much needed.
IP Logged
Caz
Murraymaniac
**********
Posts: 22,317


I'd like to be the good person my dog thinks I am!

Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #24 on: April 02, 2011, 04:12 PM »
Reply

Hi Caz.  Yes we should all stop trying to guess this one.
Greetings from a very dark Tokyo ie no neon lights as I look out from my hotel window.   Do wish Andy would put us all out of our misery with a firm decision and one which will propel him back to the tennis he is capable of playing.
Ha......absolutely! Seems like that's all we've been doing for months! Guessing this....guessing that! All I can say is when the new coach is announced, it just better be someone who's 'up to' the job! Then hopefully, we can start having decent conversations again......like, how well Andy's doing.......Remember those good ol' days?
IP Logged
Ruthie
Veteran
******
Posts: 8,935

Gender: Female
Location: East Midlands


Touch the sky - and touch it he did.

Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #25 on: April 03, 2011, 03:06 AM »
Reply

Jan, thanks for your good wishes.   I love Japan and would have been very sad to have cancelled.  So given most of my time I am well away from the disaster area it didn't feel like such a big risk.  Hope I'm not proved wrong!  Inevitably the quake casts a shadow over life here but at the same time people away from the disaster area have to get on with their lives the best they can.  And I am being looked after so well.
Yes Caz, here's to happy conversations when we can marvel at Andy's wonderful strokes, athleticism, hands - may those good ol' days come again quickly.
IP Logged
MT
Futures Level
**
Posts: 557


Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #26 on: April 05, 2011, 01:15 AM »
Reply




That sounds like a pretty good approach to me.  My mother tried to interfere a little too much when I was growing up and it did me no favours, but I know now that she did it with the best of intentions.  Unfortunately, to quote a saying, the road to hell can be paved with them.

Actually  I think its about time mothers interfered a hell of a lot more in their kids lives. Its pretty difficult being young these days particularly for girls and this generation needs some help.
IP Logged
Aileen
Murraymaniac
**********
Posts: 35,894

Gender: Female
Location: Edinburgh


Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #27 on: April 05, 2011, 01:19 AM »
Reply

Actually  I think its about time mothers interfered a hell of a lot more in their kids lives. Its pretty difficult being young these days particularly for girls and this generation needs some help.
From what I've seen of the behaviour of some of today's youngsters, I'd agree with you.  Seems to me there's not enough parental influence around.  However, there has to be a happy medium.
IP Logged
MT
Futures Level
**
Posts: 557


Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #28 on: April 05, 2011, 01:23 AM »
Reply

From what I've seen of the behaviour of some of today's youngsters, I'd agree with you.  Seems to me there's not enough parental influence around.  However, there has to be a happy medium.
Yes, my Mum was and still is a control freak. However I am still in shock from a brief glimpse of my daughter's diary. OMG.
IP Logged
Aileen
Murraymaniac
**********
Posts: 35,894

Gender: Female
Location: Edinburgh


Re: Becker says Judy Murray must go « Reply #29 on: April 05, 2011, 01:48 AM »
Reply

Yes, my Mum was and still is a control freak. However I am still in shock from a brief glimpse of my daughter's diary. OMG.
I can believe that.  I recall the horror a friend of mine had when she looked at some of the things her grandchildren were looking at, and doing, on their computers.  Seems that even using Parental Control is somewhat limited - and, anyway, what they can't do on their own computers they may well be able to on other ones.  A lot of internet cafes are quite happy to let children in unaccompanied.
IP Logged
Pages: 1 [2] Go Up Reply 
« previous next »