These are real quotes from estate agent's adverts, together with what they actually meant
"Excellent road links" - The rear garden backs onto the M6 Motorway.
"Cosy" - The room is so small you can only fit two people into it at once.
"Open plan layout" - All the internal walls have fallen down.
"Peaceful area" - There's bugger all to do within 20 miles.
"Convenient location" - The flat is above a 24-hour supermarket.
"Good scope for development" - It's a bomb site inside and out.
"The rooms in the let are presented in a minimalist style." - There's no furniture, and it's been unoccupied for 10 years.
"Lots of character" - It's not been decorated since the 1930's.
"Good access to the beach" - The house is on top of an erroding cliff.
and this one is a quote from the agent who sold our own house before we moved - "The kitchen diner has feature-style under-cupboard display lighting" - There was ONE spotlight above the cooker that cost £5 from the local DIY store!