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Author Topic: For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously  (Read 331 times)
Bevc
Murraymaniac
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Posts: 35,111

Gender: Female
Location: Cambridge - New Zealand


I'd give up chocolate but I'm no quitter!

For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously « on: August 14, 2006, 12:39 AM »
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1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.

2.. A day without sunshine is like, night.

3.. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

4.. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

5.. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

6.. I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.

7.. Honk if you love peace and quiet.

8.. Remember half the people you know are below average.

9.. Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how popular it remains?

10.. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

11.. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

12.. I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol.

13.. I intend to live forever - so far so good.

14.. Borrow money from a pessimist - they don't expect it back.

15.. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

16.. The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.

17.. Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.

18.. When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane and going the wrong way.

19.. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

20.. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

21.. For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.

22.. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.

23.. Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.

24.. No one is listening until you make a mistake.

25.. Success always occurs in private andfailure in full view.

26.. The colder the x-ray table the more ofyour body is required on it.

27.. The hardness of butter is directly proportional to the softness of the bread.

28.. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

29.. To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.

30.. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive (that goes for the car or the golf course).

31.. Two wrongs are only the beginning.

32.. The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

33.. The sooner you fall behind the more time you'll have to catch up.

34.. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

35.. Get a new car for your spouse - it'llbe a great trade!

36.. Always try to be modest and be proudof it!

37.. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

38.. Love may be blind but marriage is areal eye-opener.

39.. If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you.

 Wink
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arka
Re: For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously « Reply #1 on: August 14, 2006, 12:51 AM »
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Loving them. goodjob

The last one is also the signature of a MW member - http://www.murraysworld.com/messageboard/index.php?action=profile;u=21
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Bevc
Murraymaniac
**********
Posts: 35,111

Gender: Female
Location: Cambridge - New Zealand


I'd give up chocolate but I'm no quitter!

Re: For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously « Reply #2 on: August 14, 2006, 12:57 AM »
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The last one is also the signature of a MW member - http://www.murraysworld.com/messageboard/index.php?action=profile;u=21

What a good memory you have!
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arka
Re: For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously « Reply #3 on: August 14, 2006, 01:06 AM »
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For things that hardly matter. wink
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davidB
John McEnroe
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Posts: 17,541

Gender: Male
Location: Mentalville


If at first you don't succeed, you fail.

Re: For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously « Reply #4 on: August 14, 2006, 03:28 AM »
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hmmm... i'll have to personally shoot whoever made up that first one... but other than that great!!!
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Bevc
Murraymaniac
**********
Posts: 35,111

Gender: Female
Location: Cambridge - New Zealand


I'd give up chocolate but I'm no quitter!

Re: For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously « Reply #5 on: August 14, 2006, 04:22 AM »
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hmmm... i'll have to personally shoot whoever made up that first one... but other than that great!!!

I knew SOMEONE would be offended by that one!  Embarassed
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davidB
John McEnroe
*********
Posts: 17,541

Gender: Male
Location: Mentalville


If at first you don't succeed, you fail.

Re: For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously « Reply #6 on: August 14, 2006, 02:22 PM »
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well maybe you didnt know this about me but i'm mr environmentalist...
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arka
Re: For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously « Reply #7 on: August 14, 2006, 02:23 PM »
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Me too.
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