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Phone Menu at the Mental Health Institute

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Bevc
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I'd give up chocolate but I'm no quitter!

Phone Menu at the Mental Health Institute « on: August 14, 2006, 11:43 AM »
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Hello, and thank you for calling the Mental Health Institute

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly

If you have multiple personalities, press 2, 3 and 4.

If you suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder, press 5 but do it v-e-r-y- s-l-o-w-l-y and carefully.

If you are dyslexic, press 6. Now press 9. Now press 6. Now press 9. Now press 6.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mothership.

If you have short term memory loss, press 8. If you have short term memory loss, press 8. If you have short term memory loss, press 8.

If you have schizophrenia, listen very carefully and a small voice will tell you the number to press.

If you have a nervous disorder, fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line.

If you are co-dependent, ask someone to press a number for you.

If you are depressed, don't bother to press any numbers. No one will be able to help you anyway.

If you are paranoid, you don't need to press anything. We know who you are, we know what you want, and we know how to reach you.

If you suffer from low self-esteem, please hang up because all our operators are too busy to talk to you.

 Whistle
 
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davidB
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Re: Phone Menu at the Mental Health Institute « Reply #1 on: August 14, 2006, 01:51 PM »
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roflmao
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davew
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Rofl, xbox 360 elite

Re: Phone Menu at the Mental Health Institute « Reply #2 on: August 14, 2006, 06:18 PM »
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I was about to press all the numbers at once, but then I got near the end of the list and found I didn't have to press anything Frown

Surprised
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rafa
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We have unlimited juice?This party is off the hook

Re: Phone Menu at the Mental Health Institute « Reply #3 on: August 14, 2006, 06:35 PM »
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roflmao
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rochelle
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Andy and Jamie

Re: Phone Menu at the Mental Health Institute « Reply #4 on: August 14, 2006, 07:33 PM »
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lol.. clap i really liked that one Bev , its one of your best . Thanks
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top_spin
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Re: Phone Menu at the Mental Health Institute « Reply #5 on: August 14, 2006, 11:50 PM »
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 roflmao

Love that one
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