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Aileen
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Should same-sex couples be parents? « on: December 29, 2010, 04:30 AM »
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You can tell everybody this is our son: Elton John and David Furnish welcome baby Zachary with help of a surrogate mother

Sir Elton John and his civil partner David Furnish have announced they are proud parents to a healthy baby boy.

Zachary Jackson Levon Furnish-John weighed 7lb 15oz and was 22 inches long at birth.

The couple have not said which of them is the biological father of the baby, who was born via a surrogate mother in California on Christmas Day.

'We are overwhelmed with happiness and joy at this very special moment,' Sir Elton and Furnish said in a joint statement.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1342092/Elton-John-David-Furnish-welcome-son-Zachary-help-surrogate-mother.html#ixzz19TCbvYpG


While I have every sympathy for same-sex couples who are in a long-term civil partnership, I truly do not believe that becoming parents is in the best interests of the child.  Of course the argument is that it's a stable, secure and loving relationship which is the most important thing for children, not the sexual orientation of their parents, but my view is that a child needs clearly identifiable mother and father figures if it's to have a balanced life.  Even single parents can provide this, i.e. the child is looked after by either its (female) mother or its (male) father.

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Aileen
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #1 on: December 29, 2010, 07:28 AM »
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Re: News Thread « Reply #5353 on: Today at 04:14 AM »   
From Bevc


Couldn't see a thread Aileen but I don't see a problem.  Would have been better if they could have adopted as there are too many children without families to start with.  And why does a child need both a mum and dad?  You never miss what you've never had.  There are plenty of single parents out there, through one reason or another, that seem to be coping fine.  There are also plenty of families out there, with a mum and dad, that are struggling - which is best?
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Bevc
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #2 on: December 29, 2010, 07:38 AM »
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Thanks for moving my post Aileen.

I would dispute the single parents providing a balanced life - my best friend is a single mum.  The father of her child left and good ridance I say!  I would rather her not be part of her father's life because he doesn't have the balance life that would suit her, in fact it would be nice if he could settle in a job and home!  Not everyone has the opportunity to see both parents either.

I wouldn't say that some of the celeb couples (male/female) about today make good parents but who am I to say?
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Daisy
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #3 on: December 29, 2010, 09:50 AM »
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It's probably hard for most people to comment on this as there are so few same sex couples who are parenting therefore making it hard to form an opinion.
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Quackers
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #4 on: December 29, 2010, 10:20 AM »
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There are so many opposite sex couples out there who are parents who aren't fit to be parents and kids grow up messed up. 
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eira_arian
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #5 on: December 29, 2010, 10:26 AM »
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my view is that a child needs clearly identifiable mother and father figures if it's to have a balanced life.  Even single parents can provide this, i.e. the child is looked after by either its (female) mother or its (male) father.

Surely having 2 fathers or 2 mothers just provides 2 male or female parent figures? I'm not sure what you're saying here - if a single parent family can provide a clearly identifiable mother or father figure, then surely a same sex couple can do the same (and in the context of a stable, loving relationship)?
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Ruthie
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #6 on: December 29, 2010, 10:56 AM »
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I think (but am not sure) that there is research to suggest that children can grow up just as well and happily with same sex parents as heterosexual parents.  Good parenting can take place regardless of family structure or the gender of the parents.  I think it probably helps if there are other adults in the child's life of the other gender ie adult men where the child has two mothers and adult women where the child has two fathers.
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spocler
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #7 on: December 29, 2010, 01:24 PM »
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^ I agree. I've grown up just with my mum, as a single parent, and I don't think it affects development at all. My only influences  have been from her or her female friends, yet no-one guesses that I'm an only child
So long as the parents, same sex or not same sex, allow their chldren to socialise from a young age with other children and families and have a caring environment at home, I don't see what difference it makes. The children may face difficulty growing up with other kids mocking them, but then that's not their problem - it shows that others have been brought up to be intolerant.
Plenty of 'normal' families are damaging to children.
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Elly
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #8 on: December 29, 2010, 03:05 PM »
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^ Agree with most of the above, but if a child is subject to mocking, it is very much 'their problem'.  I'd love to say I don't see what difference the sexuality of the parents makes, and in an ideal world it shouldn't, so long as the adults in question are loving, caring individuals.  However, I suspect for Joe Soap etc. the reality is very different.  Elton and David's child will be shielded from all that due to the icon status of one of the parents, I feel. 
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Daisy
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #9 on: December 29, 2010, 03:18 PM »
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Elton and David's child will be shielded from all that due to the icon status of one of the parents, I feel. 

Think that is a very valid point - plus he will be brought up in a world of "artists" who have a more liberal outlook.  Interesting that Elton John will be 82/3 by the time this little boy is 20!
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janscribe
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #10 on: December 29, 2010, 03:53 PM »
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I suppose one of the partnership is the biological father. With the right treatment, discipline and all the love that goes with good parenting, any child can grow and develop in the proper fashion. Each one is an individual and loving parents (whether male or female) should be able to give a child the space and encouragement to develop their talents. So many normal hetero parents are complete failures at parenting - I don't think it makes too much difference - it is the right quality of care and love during the formative years that give a child all they need to become a well-adjusted adult who cares for others and has the right strengths to cope with the problems they will come across in their journey through life.
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Daisy
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #11 on: December 29, 2010, 04:01 PM »
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When you really stop and think about it Jan, parenting is so haphazard for a lot of people - there really should be some kind of parenting education available for the less able in the population ...
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Elly
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #12 on: December 29, 2010, 04:08 PM »
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When you really stop and think about it Jan, parenting is so haphazard for a lot of people - there really should be some kind of parenting education available for the less able in the population ...
I don't think it'd make a lot of difference.  You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.  All you can do as a parent is your best with the skills and knowledge you have.  I, for one, would like to shield my kids from so much, but it's just not possible.  You watch them grow and learn, and then they overtake you... lol
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Daisy
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #13 on: December 29, 2010, 04:52 PM »
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I don't think it'd make a lot of difference.  You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink.  All you can do as a parent is your best with the skills and knowledge you have.  I, for one, would like to shield my kids from so much, but it's just not possible.  You watch them grow and learn, and then they overtake you... lol

Yes, but some people don't even have a grasp of the basics never mind the more exotic stuff like "the right quality of care and love during the formative years that give a child all they need to become a well-adjusted adult who cares for others and has the right strengths to cope with the problems they will come across in their journey through life. " (as Jan says) ...
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Sir Panda
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Re: Should same-sex couples be parents? « Reply #14 on: December 29, 2010, 06:26 PM »
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How would one of them gestate?
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