thanks prod. TJ explained very well why I didn't find it funny (but I hadn't wanted to spell it out) so thanks to you too tj. I've not experienced dementia at first hand but I do know from others how very distressing it is.
I must say I'm sure Prod didn't mean to be offensive or hurtful, and I must repeat my gratitude for him deleting the original post, which was just the repeat of a second hand comment anyway. That's why I didn't want Prod to feel that I, or any of us, was ganging up on him.
The thing is, I think people tend to think of Alzheimer's and dementia as just an old person having a bad memory, i.e. not knowing what day it is, who the Prime Minister is, that sort of thing. I have a dodgy memory myself, and do joke about it at times, but Alzheimer's and dementia are something quite different, and as I suggested before, not a laughing matter.
My mother didn't have Alzheimer's, but she did have a form of dementia. In her case her deterioration was slower than it would be for a person with Alzheimer's, but had she lived long enough it would have ultimately been much the same. It might sound terrible to say it, but I'm almost glad she died before the point where she forgot who her family were. That, had it happened, would have been one blow too far for a woman who had lost any real sense of joy in life and all her independence.
After my father's death I looked after Mum for two and a half years, until she died. It was tough for both of us, but at the same time we shared some moments that I'll always cherish. Typically of dementia, Mum remembered years and years back much better than she could remember an hour or so back. She recalled meeting my father like it was yesterday, more than 50 years after the event. She told me some stuff about her childhood, things she'd experienced, and also about the early days of her marriage to Dad, raising all their own children together, before they started again by adopting the rest of us - gluttons for punishment my parents!
Those moments with Mum almost make up for the bad times, the awkwardness she felt when she just couldn't remember something, the fear of being asked to do something out of her routine (dementia sufferers seem to need routine, the unknown becomes a nightmare) and worse, the day to day humiliations these sorts of conditions bring - you'll all appreciate the sorts of things I mean.