Jamie's rounded, pleasing face; Andy's dolichocephalic (eat your heart out, Will Self) Donald Duck features.
He blames everybody for his failings (mother, coach, the Davis Cup) but himself.
Any ATP win is a fine achievement but it's hardly a grand slam. He didn't beat Federer or Rafael Nadal in the final; he beat Mario Ancic, who is currently ranked No92 in the world.
After his injuries, Andy is once again in the top 10 and perhaps he will go on to be a true champion. But wouldn't it be strange if, after all the years of Henmania and near misses, he turned out to be the first British player to win Wimbledon since Fred Perry in the mid-16th century and nobody gave a toss? Perhaps he'll learn one day that loyalty and affection have to be earned. Until then, we've always got Jamie to root for in the doubles.
We can't all swan around like we're David Essex can we?